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What About Men?

One of the most commonly asked questions about Red My Lips has to do with how men can get involved. Men's voices are not only welcome, but vital if we truly want to transform our culture of sexual violence.

While the majority of rapists are men,

the majority of men are not rapists.

However, many men stay silent because they believe sexual violence is a 'women's issue.' But sexual violence impacts us all. And in order for real change to occur, we ALL need to join together and speak out.

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Why Should Men Care?

  • The majority of rapes (90-98%) are committed by men.
  • Men and boys can also be victims of sexual assault, abuse, and rape.
    • 1 in 6 boys experience sexual abuse before the age of 18 (1in6)
    • 1 in 33 men will experience rape or attempted rape in their lifetime (RAINN)
  • All men know and care about people (of all ages and genders) who have experienced sexual violence. In fact, you probably know more than you realize.
  • When people victim-blame, they often suggest that men are animals who can't control themselves. This is insulting.
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Can Men Participate in Red My Lips?

Yes, please! Whether you or someone you love has directly experienced sexual violence, or you want to show support because it's the right thing to do, your voice is important and needed!

The videos below explore some of the attitudes and beliefs that contribute to our culture of sexual violence and victim-blaming and demonstrate how men have a vital role in creating real change.

Jackson Katz explains how gender violence is not a "women's issue," but a "men's issue."

In his chilling spoken work poem "Piñata," Pages Matam responds to a disturbing comment he overheard on the bus. [Trigger Warning]

The way we view and talk about masculinity is closely connected with how we perpetuate and normalize sexual violence. In this powerful spoken word performance, Guante challenges the phrase "man up."